Break the Cycle is proud to be listed among the resources available for developers to consult with on their challenge submissions. If you would like to work with us and/or utilize our content for your app, please contact Eric Anderson, Director of Youth Programs, using the form below!

Stop callin’, stop callin’,
I don’t wanna talk anymore!

Boy, the way you blowin’ up my phone
won’t make me leave no faster…
I shoulda left my phone at home,
’cause this is a disaster!
Callin’ like a collector -
Sorry, I cannot answer!

The stress from being in constant communication with your partner can affect you in many negative ways. Checking your phone constantly and nonstop texting can make it impossible to live in the moment. This song sends an empowering message to anyone in this kind of unhealthy relationship. Change your routine, ditch your phone, hang out with friends, family or just have some “me” time.

For more information on the dynamics of technology and abuse click here.

So wouldn’t it be great if there was a bill of rights that listed things YOU had a right to—and others didn’t—to help ensure your digital sanity and safety? Well, wish no more. Athinline.org has recently launched a call asking young people to help create the very first “digital bill of rights!”

Now you can submit your ideas for rights, vote on your favorites that were submitted by others and even suggest names to replace “Digital Bill of Rights.” So, do you think you should have a right to block someone that is constantly sending you messages? How about turn off your phone when you just want some peace of mind? Well, then, submit your suggestions here and don’t forget to tell your friends to vote for your “rights” so that they can make it on to the official Digital Bill of Rights to be released this fall!

Submissions and voting ends at the end of June so don’t wait!

It is important to realize that when violence occurs in a relationship, it will likely happen again. Abuse is usually not a one-time incident; it tends to happen again, and it usually becomes worse. If your boyfriend has been abusive toward you in the past, it’s likely that he will act the same way again. This is what is called the cycle of abuse. You can learn more about the cycle of abuse here.

Change is not impossible but it is a hard and long process, and takes a lot of work and commitment from the abuser. The abuser must recognize and acknowledge that their actions and behavior were wrong and abusive. And it’s not something that the abuser can fix on their own; they must have professional help to make that change.

Keep in mind that if you begin to see warning signs again, it’s important to address it right away. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who will respect you, support you and treat you well. You also deserve to be happy and to feel happy about your relationship. Find out what you can do if you see warning signs of abuse.

Trust your instincts. It’s up to you to decide whether or not this relationship is the best thing for you. However, if you don’t feel respected or treated right, this relationship is not the healthy one you deserve.

What People Are Saying

“I consider emotional abuse the same as any other. It may not be as severe but it leaves big internal marks. My now ex was my friend for 2 months. Looking back on it I see how he would come up behind me and walk behind me to control my moves. He would make harsh comments about my struggle with self-injury. He blamed me for his panic attacks. He said I was the wrong part of his life. It was terrible, a nightmare. It isn’t over and I haven’t accepted it yet, but I know I need to speak out.” – California, 15

“Abuse is a terrible thing. I went through it and abused people. It’s not cool at all, you know.” – Texas, 15

“I really enjoy your site. I think it is absolutely fabulous for helping teens cope with relationship issues and domestic violence. I am recommending this site to all my friends.” – New York, 17

“I was in an abusive relationship for almost 2 years, I didn’t really do much but work and see him. He would always call and text me, and when I didn’t reply he would get mad and make false accusations, and he would always tell me I’m over weight when I’m small. Today I finally had it. I broke the cycle, and if you are in a relationship that’s abusive, take the quiz and break away. Us women deserve better! Abuse is not normal, no matter how much they tell you they love you or how much you love them. I hope this may be of somewhat help to someone else. ” – California, 22

“I was in horrible relationships for the past 4 years. I handled physical & mental abuse. I was hit, threatened, and always put down. I never thought I would find any guy for myself until I found my new boyfriend. He treats me like a queen. He would never think of hitting me and he tells me to forget about the past & completely move on. This shows you that dealing with abuse or settling isn’t the right thing. Always look for the best because no matter what you deserve it.” – Georgia, 16

“I have recently just gotten out of a four and a half year relationship and throughout this relationship. I took in mainly a lot of mental and verbal abuse and until recently towards the end of our relationship, some physical abuse. I was constantly threatened every time I tried to leave him and I felt nothing but stress and depression throughout those four years. It has gotten to the point where I felt I was finally ready to leave and that I knew I deserved better. It was hard for me at first to imagine my life without him but I knew that if I were to go back to him, like I have done many times in the past, that nothing would change. It has been four months now since I left him and it has been the best decision of my life. I feel like I’ve gotten my life back and that I can finally breathe again! It’s honestly a great feeling and I hope others who are in this similar situation will eventually do what is right for them and get to this point in life that I am at now. Total freedom.” – California, 22

“Abuse is messed up and if you know anyone who does it, get out of their life.” – Connecticut, 15

“It is most important to protect victims of violence and to make aware this social problem. The concern however is to also make aware male victims. They tend to be ashamed to speak out and get support.” – California, 44

“Relationship abuse is illegal and wrong! People blaming others for their violent and agressive behavior, calling them names, forcing sex on them etc. People who abuse others are nothing but insecure, good for nothing cowards! Relationship abuse needs to stop now!” – Idaho, 22

“No matter what anyone tells you, you have to realize for yourself that you are in an abusive relationship and that it isn’t healthy. Just know that there is a better lifestyle out there and that you can be happy, whether if it means being out of a relationship for a while and figuring yourself out, or being with someone who actually treats you right! Once you find the strength to get through it, you can do anything. ” – Massachusetts, 17

“It was my first semester in college and I was 18 years old. I had formed somewhat of a relationship with a guy who I ended up having “physical contact” with 1 time when I was drunk. At a party one night, I believe I was drugged. I had 1 drink and blacked out, and when I came to, I was vomiting over a toilet. I have no clue how I got from one place to the next. Friends kept trying to get me to go home with them, but I couldn’t stand up and when people carried me I was in pain. To this day, I have no idea what was in my system. Anyways, after the party when everyone went home, I was still sitting over the toilet more sick than I had ever been in my entire life. This guy who I had that experience with 1 time came into the bathroom, took my pants off after me faintly saying no and using what little strength I had to move away. I had no strength to keep him off of me. I was sexually abused while holding myself up against the toilet. It wasn’t until the other day that I understood this was rape. I felt it was my fault because I must have been really drunk, but it wasn’t my fault – whether I was drugged or really intoxicated. If you have a similar story, I want you to know it is NOT your fault!! And you NEED to tell someone other than friends, you need to tell someone who can do something about it.” – Florida, 20

“It is Christmas evening and I am waking up in the hospital bed. I received a phone call from my family and friends telling me that the one that was supposed to love me almost took my life. I would hear the silence on the other end and all i could do was hold the phone and listen to them cry. I keep hearing the question…Why?? I do not remember much besides the ride in the ambulance with a really bad concession and hit to the head. Now it has been a year and a half and I would have never imagined that my boyfriend would try to kill me with a mallet. I have a TBI (traumatic brain injury) now because of him. As women we are very caring people and always think that they will change. I gave him so many chances and was going to finally leave him after Christmas but it was too late because he decided to change my life forever. It is said that a woman will try to leave seven times before she actually leaves. We need to leave them the first time they hit you! I wish I left before it go t this far. I do know that God kept me alive and gave me this second chance to speak for the women that have passed away from domestic violence. He also gave me the strength and guidance to help other women in my same situation. If you’re scared to leave meet with your local domestic violence shelters or advocacy they are there to help you.” – Minnesota, 22

*Comments and opinions displayed on this post do not necessarily reflect those of Break the Cycle.